Waiting for the Bus

The craziest thing happened on the way to Hell today. I was on the Commuter Express 549 bus and the driver was yucking it up with some passenger about her weekend encounter with a man who had "tendencies"; which I think was her way of inferring that the man was a homosexual, when her dispatcher called her and asked her for the approximate time she made a specific stop. Apparently, she blew past a bunch of people waiting at her last stop before she got onto the freeway. So what's the big deal? There is nothing crazy nor remarkable about a bus driver NOT stopping to pick you up. What was astounding was her reaction. She pulled over on the side of the freeway and began to question the passengers on whether or not we recalled her making that last stop and demanded we provide written statements. She then told her dispatcher that she would go back to pick up the stranded would be passengers. I could not resist. I said out loud, "what's the big deal? This is not the first time someone missed a bus. Bus drivers have left me more times than I can count." I have had to run in the rain along side a speeding bus frantically flailing my arms only to be splashed by the speeding tires plowing through enormous puddles. I have been ignored at dark posts waiting late night for the very last bus, only to have to walk home the 2 mile route. I was completely baffled by both the reaction of the driver and dispatcher. Why just the other day, the MTA driver of bus #6748 violently maneuvered through rain slicked streets, carelessly talking loudly on his bluetooth, "...nigga, that bitch came over to my house..." Absolutely fascinating.

To Dye For

The Day: July 10, 2006. The Place: HELL's basement. My soul was slowly being sucked away when I had to take a piss. While I washed my hands in the bathroom I stumbled into some creative lighting and I noticed a shiny glare in the part in my hair. I drew closer to the mirror and that glare was gone. I knew what it was but I resisted the idea, blaming the terrible neon lights in HELL yet I walked away with a nagging looming sense of doom. Weeks later it happened again. This time there was no question about it, I had my first gray hair. A sort of panic struck me. Memories of my mother and her terrible eggplant colored hair filled my thoughts. I was desperate to hide my aging shame so that evening I stopped at Target and picked up a color closest to that of my youthful locks.

It has been a journey in hair dye purgatory that I am eager to end. In the past 3 years one gray hair turned into 3 and 3 have become 5 (which i refuse to pluck). I am not afraid to grow old, nor ashamed to embrace my age. But I desperately want my gray hairs to form some attractive order, some pattern, like a skunk or the bride of Frankenstein rather than the sporadic sprinkled arrangement they seem to have settled upon.



My first dye which was Feria's Chocolate Cherry #36 was rich and long lasting. But along with its long lasting effect, lingered the damage: dry, brittle hair. Somewhere down the line, Loreal changed the formula of this product, and it's no longer as rich as it once was. The color is now flat, and leans toward a purple hue. It was my go to product early on. But now, the lack luster color and guaranteed damage makes it a must skip.

For a while I searched for a replacement and had a lot of misses:



Both of these Garnier colors: Dark Reddish Brown # 452 and Deep Auburn #460 (which I am convinced are exactly the same product in different boxes) left my hair that dreaded grandma eggplant purple color. The good thing about them was that there was very little damage. My hair felt soft and deeply conditioned. But they are both weak, non long lasting colors which is normally a bad thing. In both cases there was not 100% gray coverage like promised. Overall a terrible color that smells really nice.

At almost $13 dollars or more this product is by far worth every penny. Clariol's Perfect 10 4R is just that, perfect. In only 10 minutes you get a root applicator to target grays, a rich full bodied shine, no damage, nice scent and best of all, no purple hue. We have a winner.

But if you are on a budget, Superior Preference 4M is a happy medium. Full gray coverage, deep conditioning (with an awful chemically after smell) and rich color only slightly on the brink of purple.

In a sad embarrassing conclusion aside from the reaffirmation of the old adage; you get what you pay for, it would be simply easier to embrace the gray and crawl out from underneath these boxes of promised youth. Maybe next year.